[heart]

mmmm. =] He likes me.

<3

I heart you little one!

I love my baby niece. Everything about her is cute, even her name: Emma Marie Joy. Darling, I know.

So here's a picture of her, because she's so cute, and I love her so much, and I want the world to see how  much I love her.

She's at Colonial Williamsburg with Grandma - who couldn't resist the temptation to buy Emma a reproduction "mob-cap".

I love you baby Emma. <3

Apple.... CORE!

Training for Apple is kinda cool. Its a classroom style, 3 day training group. Its also called Core, which I think is one of the most delightful puns I have ever heard. XD

My Core has about 50 people in it, from about 10 different locations. It seems to be a fun group of geeks, all fairly diverse, and spanning a lot of age groups. The mentors and leaders are pretty cool too... We're on a 15 minute break right now, and though we've done almost nothing besides introductions, I think its gonna be an interesting weekend....  =]

*Updates through-out the weekend*

Can this be done yet?

I think I'm done. I wonder how much noise that box will make when it hits the floor.

A lot of noise I hope, probably with the sound of shattering glass. Yeah....

I hope you step on it with bare feet.

Bleh...

I started the morning with an emotional hangover.

I went to bed angry last night. Not just angry either, but really angry, incredibly angry, so angry that most metal rock didn't sound angry enough. There was a lot of anger.

I often read in the evening, in bed, to unwind a bit. I could hardly concentrate though because I was just so upset, and ended up falling to sleep to some more rock music - the grown-ups' irritable version of "rock-a-bye baby". I slept really well actually, in a deep and peaceful sleep. But when I woke up I suddenly remembered what was so infuriating the night before and became just as upset again.

I ended up reading calming materials about peace and love, until the death-metal started sounding like an over-reaction instead of [as it previously had] the fitting end to Krissy Gill.

This whole anger-fest was about a manager at Applebee's. I don't know why, but where I'm concerned, she's got a total chip on her shoulder and she's just daring me to knock it off. I came really damn close to it last night.

Her housemate, Jeff, works at Applebee's too and is probably one of my favorite people there. He's told me before that Krissy is, for some unbeknownst reason, really harsh on new people. He's told her before that she needs to start being nice to the new hires, since half of them are scared of her. I'm not scared of her, she's the manager lowest on the totem pole. But I don't get why she is so bitter to me.

Where I'm concerned, Krissy is particularly nasty, more so than to any of the other new-ish people there. I noticed this about a week ago. I'll ask her for help with something, like voiding an item on a bill [for which I need an manager's override card], and she will make me wait, because she's chatting with someone. Or she yells at me for interfering with Expo [getting the food out], when all I'm doing is grabbing a small plate and not messing with the food she is plating at all. I realized there was unfair treatment going on when another employee had grabbed a plate a few minutes before, and had not been yelled at for doing his job.

It is highly frustrating. And if I ever let it slip to another manager the things she is doing, I can guarantee she finds a way to get back at me, even though I wasn't trying to get her in trouble!

Last night I worked a double - meaning I was there basically forever. At one point in the evening, I needed something voided from a check so the lady could pay and leave. She was old with a bunch of small grandkids and so it was especially important to be prompt. I went to find a manager, and found Krissy out back, trying to find her lighter in her purse. She informed me that I'd just have to wait because she was smoking. o.O

I told her I couldn't wait that long and went and found another manager, B., who was extremely busy, helping the host. I explained that I needed a void. She asked if it was possible to get Krissy's help. I explained that I'd just asked her and what she'd told me. B. wasn't at all happy. I knew right then that she was going to mention it to Krissy, and I also knew that Krissy would find a way to punish me. She did.

Its the time of year everyone hates: Inspections and tests. The inspections require hours of extra cleaning, and the tests are time-consuming, stupid, and impossible to answer 100% correct on the first go, because they contain lots of stupid questions that aren't discussed in the review videos or on the menus. Most managers require 80% to pass. Krissy is in charge of them this time, and she's requiring 100% which is making everyone hate her.

But, she lets us copy each other and use cheat sheets, so its not too bad. Well, except for me that is. I'm not allowed to talk to anyone while doing the tests, not am I allowed to create a cheat sheet, and she reviewed my notes to make sure I wasn't putting any cheating things on them. Not only that, but she won't let me do the basic tests like everyone else, but is making me re-do the entire server new-hire training module with tests.

She kept me 90 minutes after my shift last night doing these tests, because she refused to cash me out until I did x-amount. I was the first one cut for the night shift, and one of the last to leave. I was so angry with her. I think that she didn't argue with me when I told her I was going home and she was going to cash me out only because I looked slightly deranged and as if I would murder someone if she said no.

She did give me this long talk though, during cash out, about how important these asinine tests are [even the GM admits they are almost pure b.s.]. She also asked me to come in an hour early today to work on them more. I told her I couldn't. She asked what I was doing that was more important. I think I just sort of stared at her and muttered something and just got the hell out of there.

So yeah. I have to work with her tonight too. But I'm not going to take any of this bs from her. I'm also calling the GM and lodging an official complaint. This nonsense has got to stop.

My first glimpse of Apple behind the scenes. =]

I just got back from signing my employment forms at Apple. This means I was allowed to go behind the big shiny silver door into the back rooms and hang out with the managers etc for a half hour. It was the most fun I've ever had doing paperwork in my life.

The store I'm working at is in this enormous and expensive mall. You know the kind I mean, Anthropologie on one corner, Gucci down the corridor, Louis Vuiton, Juicy Couture, Ralph Lauren and Betsy Johnson across the hall. Nice place.

I went in to sign papers at 8 this morning, meaning everything but Apple is still closed, and even that is only open for people with appointments. There was one of those black elastic lines in front of the door, to keep people from poking around in the store just yet. I hesitated for a moment on seeing it, but one of the employees looked up and said "Are you an employee?" I smiled and said "I am now." She laughed, welcomed me and told me to go on in.

It was so cool to be able to say that. I just can't help but smile when I tell people I work for Apple. =]

But yeah, back to the subject, fun paperwork. It sounds like an oxymoron, I know, but it was actually fairly amusing.

Here's what I saw behind the big silver door. A great big, warehouse. And some random offices stuck in corners. There were random tables standing about the place, those plastic pop-up ones that you get for $20 at Walmart, with chairs haphazardly placed around it, and bits of wire and cables and stuff sort of thrown on top. There are computers all over the place back there, and not just the ones in boxes. You'll pass the shelves of products, and just randomly wedged between a box of keyboards and another of mice, you find a great large iMac. Why it is just sitting on the shelf, I have no idea. Maybe they use them for inventory or something. Cables, cords, iPod docks, and other objects in various states of disrepair are in large bins labeled with things like "Sellable," "Repackage," and "Doesn't Work". It seems a very elementary but efficient organizational system. Its like the IT office at any given company, except the wires are less tangly. At any rate, just by looking around, you can tell that even though this is a hugely successful retail company, behind the shiny store front, its really just a bunch of computer geeks running things.

My paper work was digital, which was nice and expidited the whole procedure a lot. Then it was print the pdf and sign a few things and voila, I am officially working for Apple! I was filling out the forms in the office with a couple of managers, who were emailing and counting money and other such things. This was another time I noticed that they really are all just tech geeks. While in there, they just start talking about how the count from last night was short several hundred dollars. As you may know, usually managers don't discuss this sort of thing in front of random employees, and on top of that, they were remarkably cavalier about the situation. They were more puzzled by the lack of funds then they were worried about it. Of course they were concerned, but it wasn't in that uptight, nervously worried way.

At one point some long-haired guy pokes his head in and says "goodmorning." The managers said hi and continued working, I looked up and smiled. I then realized that neither of the managers had actually stopped looking at their computers during this exchange of greetings. How did I realize that? After the guy left, one manager turned to the other and said, "Not sure who that was, I didn't recognize the voice." She responded "Me neither. Must have been one of the new guys." They looked at me, and I gave a brief description of the guy. "Oh..." said the one. "That was probably Andrew..... Or maybe Phil." The other nods while still typing, "Yep, probably," she said.  LOL

I'm going to love working there. =]

[I have a 3 day training seminar on the 24th, after which I'll be on the schedule. Woot!]

YAYAYAY!!!

So, my Super Exciting News: I GOT THE JOB AT APPLE!!!!! I'm so excited and happy I can't begin to describe it. XD

Alright, you might be wondering whats up with me and posting stuff lately. I'll tell you. I have 3 posts, yes, three, that are written and just need a bit of cleaning up. I have not, however, had time to do said editing though, due largely to the Apple hiring process. I spent a week of free time playing with the various applications in the iLife suite [iPhoto, iMovie, iDVD, Garageband, and iWeb, for those of you who don't know] in order to be up to date and speak coherently about them in order to move forward to the next step of the interview process.

This however meant that writing got pushed to the back burner, and the posts came together in bits and pieces. Editing is the most difficult process of a post, and I just haven't had the time or energy to do it. No worries, you'll get to hear all about my random doings on a regular basis again NOW THAT I'VE BEEN HIRED BY APPLE!!!

Yes, I am going to continue randomly yelling that fact in this post. =]

One of the things I had to do for Apple was to create a podcast. Except, they wanted a podcast with video, so more like a short movie. [A podcast is like a recorded radio show] I ditched the podcast concept altogether and just made a movie. Its by no means perfect, and large amounts of it were made between 1 and 4 in the morning, timing isn't always right, and visuals don't always flow like I had in mind, but whatever. I think its pretty decent for my first ever movie, and made in random bits of time when I wasn't working.

See, I had 48 hours to complete this podcast thing. I was working a lot of that time. The whole thing was oddly reminiscent of midterm exams - just sorting through the information and words in your brain at all hours of the day and night and trying to condense it into a sensible and coherent format. And then actually creating it at 3am, that was a lot like midterms too. =]

The terms of the assignment were thus: in 48 hours, create a podcast entitled "Why Me?" about why you are the best candidate to work at Apple, and keep it under 3 minutes.

This is what I came up with:

Ta-Da!

Anyway yo, I'm off to a cookie party. Chill out, stay cool, and be nice to shopping carts.

[IMA WORK AT APPLE!]

Oh the suspense...

So I'm writing a very cool post, but its not finished yet. I'm actually writing several posts, but with one I am having difficulty in really conveying what I mean to say. Let me briefly explain...

I'm writing about something quite serious; heartache and heartbreak are not funny or amusing, or at all pleasant to experience. Sometimes they feel overwhelming. You can have a lovely day, upbeat, positive... and then you get into bed, turn out the lights, and out of the blue you become acutely aware that you are the only person in your bed. Your heart gets these odd, miserable, confusing feelings. The sheets don't feel right, the pillows don't squish like they ought to. Everything is just off. You hunt sleep, and fall into it - fitfully - several hours later.

Its not a pleasant topic. Its not easy. Its not even something most people want to hear about, let alone read in their spare time. But its part of my life, and I need to write it. So when its done, it will be posted here. Skip it if you want, but I think you should read it.

But I did say I was writing a cool post too. After the seriousness you get to see what I think about shopping carts. I'm convinced that they lead secret lives, that us humans know nothing about. But I'm onto them and their ways....

Until later, Adieu.  <3

Post Script:

I'd like to work on a series of very short stories about this character I drew randomly:

Her name is [obviously] Pigletta. I don't know what kind of adventures she has though. I've decided to leave that up to you! Leave a comment, just a sentence or two, about something you'd like to see her do, and I'll draw you and her a story. =] You're welcome.

Genius. =]

I've had the Bouncy crimp in my head all day... 

I really enjoy working as a waitress, but sometimes people are a little weird. Like today, a lady with a $12 total left me a 71¢ tip.  o.O  Really? $0.71? and in dimes and pennies.. couldn't you have left me with 4 cents more and 3 whole quarters, which I can actually use for laundry?

But in moments like those, the Bouncy crimp came to my rescue. I was a bit exasperated, but it was kind of funny, so I sang myself some crimps, did a little dance, and in mere moments I was laughing [as were my co-workers =]

But all that aside: Today has been genius.

I woke up grinning like a Cheshire cat. I worked on some blog stuff, then walked down the street and got my hair cut - so its short and comfy, and oh so cute. I've been in a smashing, unbeatably good mood all day - nothing can phase me.

Its the power of the crimp.

Here's a song I <3 and it seems somehow appropriate for my day: Love you, by Free Design.

Hyperbole and a Half = Awesome

I got kind of obsessed with this blog called Hyperbole and a Half a couple weeks ago. Its amazing, you should read it and follow it, because Allie Brosh is fabulous and she would love you very much if you followed her. I'm not kidding, she might draw you a picture or something.

She inspired me to start my own blog. I've tried blogging on 3 different occassions. Clearly, all my past attempts have failed. When I thought I  had nothing to write about and/or simply ignored my blogs, they curled up in the fetal position in some remote corner of the internet and cried. Every time I tried to come near them after that they just looked up at me from their respective corners, with these large pitiful eyes in their hollow tear-streaked faces, and I thought it would be too cruel to give them false hope by posting more stuff on them - I knew I was only going to forget about them again immediately afterward. So in the end, I let them be to live out their internet existences in peace.

I think I just tried too hard to write about stuff that was "interesting", or "worth talking about". But Allie Brosh helped me realize that blogs don't have to be all serious. They don't have to be boring either. They don't even have to do the "Hi, I'm sharing my journal with the world" thing, because nobody really wants to read that either. Thanks to Hyperbole and a Half, I realized that my blog could just be about me and all the random stuff in my head. And people will [potentially] actually read it!

So, when I started my blog I was thinking something like "How hard could this possibly be?" I noticed that Allie once mentioned it taking her approximately 10 hours to complete a really good post. "10 hours?!" I thought. "Even with those cool pictures, that seems like an exorbitant amount of time. It will never take me that long - probably she's just really slow." But as I started writing my own stuff, I realized how easy it would be to take 10 hours to have something worth putting out there.

This is probably what happens when Allie blogs: She gets this idea for a post, and sits down with her computer to write it [if she is anything like me, the idea is a sort of half-formed sentence flying erratically around her brain] She opens a word processor and Paintbrush - then proceeds to write a few sentences, and doodles a bit just to help her think. As she tries to catch that erratically careening idea and put it on digital paper, this giant monster comes stomping into her mind and says in this growly voice "Allie!  Write a blog post or I will eat all of your ideas!"

So then she's all like "But I'm trying to write, Monster!! If you eat my ideas I will be sad and have nothing to write about, and you will have nothing left to eat!" And that monster is kind of a jerk and is like "I don't care. I will just eat someone else's ideas when I'm done," and proceeds to stomp around her brain eating the ideas right out of her head until the only thing that she can do is draw pictures. But because her artistic genius flows so freely from someplace deeper than the birthplace of ideas, the Monster can't eat the picture-creating thoughts, and after he has eaten all the noticeable ideas, he gets bored and leaves.

But looking at her pictures gives her lots of awesome new ideas, and now her brain is uncluttered because the monster cleared some space in her head - making that flittering idea easier to catch and hang onto, and so she starts frantically writing these really fantastic new blog posts and has these cool, monster-conquering pictures to go with them!

That's how a see it in my head anyway. Those monsters are jerks. She's a monster-fighting blogging hero.  You should read her stuff. [Read her blog here! its genius.]

Boosh, Boosh, stronger than a Moose...

I recently devoured the entire 3 seasons of that awesome and deliciously funny tv series, The Mighty Boosh.

Also, I think I'm now addicted to Noel Fielding.

I discovered the show quite by accident several months ago. I was babysitting two cute little boys, one of whom was named Noel [not like the Christmas season - it sort of rhymes with "mole"]. Here's a little known fact about me: I collect names. I have lists of them tucked away in various places; you just never know when you're going to need a name. So, anyway, when I got home from this babysitting gig, I looked up the name origins online.

My google search introduced me to him: Noel Fielding. A couple of youtube clips later, and I was laughing hysterically. I wanted badly to see The Mighty Boosh, but couldn't find much of it on youtube, and got sort of distracted by other things on the interblag, and forgot about it all for a bit.

Well, several weeks ago, my roommate hooked me up with a sort of Russian version of Facebook, which awesomely enough, has these pages where you can watch English tv shows. Using your deductive reasoning, I'm sure you're figuring out that through this facebook knock-off I found the Boosh, and consequently watched all of it, and that brings us all to this:

I'm still addicted to Noel Fielding.

He's my new celebrity crush - the first time ever that I've crushed on a celebrity who isn't part of a band - its a big step for me, a whole different ball game. [Thats if you don't count Johnny Depp or Orlando Bloom: females are genetically programmed to have crushes on those two, so they don't count.] These actors, they're a crazy lot. Noel seems to be a bit crazy too, but his style of crazy is exactly to my liking.

For example, he wears outrageously fashionable "mod" clothing. He is not afraid to wear a poncho. He's an artist: and he makes these really cool pictures. He has been known to dance in public - not as part of his show, but in Real Life. He makes up these songs [with his Mighty Boosh counterpart, Julian Barratt] called crimps. Heres one of my favorites:



Noel is just so devilishly funny. He's also in his late 30's. But he's also single.

XD

Does anyone have PR connections that could get me his home address?

I will make you cupcakes.

Popsicle Love

I made this picture for my sister. While working on several new posts [because right now I'm incapable of concentrating on one at a time - inefficient, but diverting], I was looking at some of my Paintbrush drawings and found this one, called Popsicle Love.

I don't know why it is called that. But it is, and it is cute.

New post soon. I'm finished with the entirety of The Mighty Boosh, so I have no distractions anymore. =]

Apple? For REAL?! =D

Last week I got invited to a recruiting seminar for Apple. It was very exciting for me because I've applied to work at dozens of Apple stores, and never has anything come from it. Nothing, nothing at all - even though I would love to work there and would fit in so perfectly and make tons of sales and love the product and talk to everyone and be the most amazing specialist ever....

[Gasp for breath]

And anyone who's ever applied to work for Apple knows they are notoriously difficult to land a job with - they are coveted positions. Statistically speaking, its more difficult to get a job in Apple than it is to get into an Ivy League school. So you can understand why something even as vague as an invitation to a recruitment seminar made me feel all giddy with excitement every time I thought about it.

For days preceding the seminar, my life went something like this: I'd get up, go about my business, start chores [usually not finishing them], and get distracted on the internet. Inevitably something would come up that would make me remember the seminar, and suddenly I'd be grinning like a Cheshire cat at the thought of my upcoming Meeting of Awesomeness.

I kind of expected there to be a small mob of people there. In fact, I don't really know what I was expecting. Part of me was like "omigodajobthingatApple!" But I'm trying to be sensible and realistic, so instead I was like "I'm going to own the shit out of that seminar!". Containing your hopes to realistic-excited, and not the getting-my-hopes-up-excited is so hard to do when you're staring a career dream in the face. Its got a really nice face too, that looks something like this:

And that is the shape of my dreams. Do you see why I have a hard time containing my excitement to levels of normalcy?!

Of course, the seminar was nothing like that. It looked more like this:

Yes, we role-played. And we were required to spend 10 minutes goofing around with technology. Fireworks and bacon? no. Really kick-ass anyway? Hellz yes.

And the best part? 24 hours later, I got an email asking me to come in for a real interview. XD
I was so happy I spent the next few minutes dancing to "Celebration" in my underwear.
Hey, you gotta find some way to make it special, right?

Words in my head

Sometimes I feel like I have so many words flying around in my head, that if they were to go round just a little faster my skull would turn into a sort of linguistic version of a particle collider. If it wasn't for my ability to get the thoughts out of my head and on paper, Switzerland and the Hadron project might find themselves abandoned as I sucked up all their funding, and scientists rushed to study my head instead of looking for Higgs boson.

But fortunately for everyone, they get to keep playing NASCAR with bits of matter, and I get to write stuff instead of being prodded by scientists. Now, if instead of pimping my head as a word-collider, I could get funded for writing, I would be intensely happy with the world.  And I could afford to buy delicious cupcakes every morning for breakfast. <3 And maybe pay my rent on time.

I moved to Boston from Virginia about two months ago. I needed a change of pace, to start a new chapter in life. I'd been on little visits to Boston before and it seemed perfect... So I packed my car, put the cat in the passenger seat, and 10 hours later.... tada! New apartment, new people, fresh starts. It was pretty cool and exciting and stuff.

But then it got kind of not cool. I basically knew 4 people in the state, only one of whom I was really friends with, in any sense of the word, so I've been a bit lonely. I got a job super fast though, but it didn't last long. Neither did the next job. I don't know how, but I have a talent for finding psychotic female bosses. Insert a couple jobless, anxious weeks here: ______, and that brings us to now. I've got a new job, but so new that I still haven't received a paycheck. And I'm basically broke.  But I do know more than 4 people!

Here are some awesome things about Boston:
It is fairly small for a big city. Easy to learn to drive in, and super walkable. And it has these cute little beaches. You're just walking around a neighborhood and then bam! you're on a beach.
Port cities are always cool. Lots of cultures, and that means lots of cool stores, and delicious food. Like Irish bakeries where the cashier girls have attitude and the cupcakes are amazing...

I live just round the corner from that bakery. I went in looking for a cupcake, because at 1am that morning I had this sudden craving for cupcakes, and by 3pm eating one had become crucial to my immediate survival.  So I bought this huge cupcake. It was just plain old vanilla cake, but it had a piece cut out of the top, and this little crater was filled with strawberry preserves and whipped cream... and then had the cut out bit of cake stuck back on top! It was a beautiful thing. But it also cost me $2.75.

But life is good. Sometimes the mere fact that you are living in a place that sells amazing cupcakes, has beaches right along the road, has good music, good food, and good people... sometimes that makes up for the fact that you can't afford any of it yet. I mean, you're living in Boston! And it's one helluva cool place.